FEMME

Nr 105 - DECEMBER 1996

Isabelle Adjani, extracts of statements to Thierry COLBY
at the occasion of a private screening of the film "La chambre tranquille", by Australian director Rolf de Heer.

Translated by Marcel Durieux

(version française)

  
 

Isabelle ADJANI :


We always must speak honestly with our children and explain to them what is happening. I always try to do that. The child has an unconscious that structures itself through the presence of parents and its language. The first two years of its life are very important because it's then that language builds itself. The little girl in the film* is 7 years old, but she becomes the mediator between her two parents. Unfortunately that happens frequently to children.


Everyone should read Francoise Dolto before the birth of a baby, one will learn from it more about how to communicate with ones child, even before birth. She has revolutionized the world of comprehension of the child. She is truly the greatest practical expert of childhood that I know. She has saved the children from what threatens them when the parents do not know. In general, when you love your child, you find the right thing to do, but if you have doubts, if you feel you don't find it, then you have problems to solve, and it must be done.


When a couple has separated, one must always maintain the relations of the child with the two parents. For me, it's very important to respect the relation that the other parent has with the child. It's essential for its proper development. The child does not necessarily need the physical presence of the two parents, the motherhood and fatherhood, it's not the same thing. But it does need to remain connected to one and the other, to the father and to the mother.


If you can avoid separations, it's wonderful! But if you can not always be there, what is important is to maintain the link and, if you can, to stay close to your child, to hold it against you (this is often understood by parents to block the child from becoming autonomous, which is an error), ah well, one should not be afraid of that, on the contrary.


Our children, in any case to age 4, need to be reassured by physical contact with the mother, and there should also be in place for the child what is represented by the father: the law, if he is able to take that place in all safety.


It bothers me very much that it is so simple these days for a parent, be it father or mother, to consider and decide to separate, without really trying first to form a family for and around the child. I look around me and near me, and I am troubled that there are so many who have families cut in two, where the role of the continuing and discontinued parent has become the new way to love - like a fashion - and raise the child.

 

 * La chambre tranquille("The quiet room") tells the story of Marie, age 7, who is present at the endless disputes and fights of her parents who are at the point of rupture. To her, words become hurting weapons, so she will escape into silence and from the back of her blue room will powerlessly observe the adults destroying themselves.

(Photos 1 & 2 : Isabelle and Gabriel-Kane, ©Paris Match)

 
Sommaire
Actualités
Filmographie
Théâtre
Musique
Publicité
Liens
Merci
Livre d'or
Bibliographie
Récompenses
Biographie
Interviews
Mode
Presse
Quizz
FAQ
©Anne-Claire Schlesinger 1996 - 2005     -   Tous droits réservés. Toute reproduction strictement interdite.